Sick and Tired

Well Morgan Cooper had a challenging weekend. Friday night Em threw up in her bed and continued to be sick throughout the night. And if you know me at all, we were all waiting to see what happened when this happened to me with my kid. Wes says I was great. Eventually, when her stomach was empty but she was still getting sick, we were a little worried about her and called the on call service with our pediatrician. Learning it took a lot longer than I thought for her to get dehydrated, we were reassured. But it was by far the worse experience thus far as a parent. I did not sleep at all on Friday night, Wes slept a little because Em wasn't sitting on him. But I have apparently bruised my butt bones from sitting on the side of the tub for the hours, and a twisted up muscle in my back from holding her. I napped when she napped yesterday to try to catch up and went to bed at 9:30pm last night. Em slept about 2 1/2 hours straight after she stopped gagging and woke up pretty much fine. Sleepy, but fine. Ready to eat and drink - which of course we couldn't let her do. Wes and I had both been scheduled to work weekend hours this weekend - Engineering Day for him and a home show for my other job for me. We had to cancel on that. Family was in town, randomly, and we couldn't visit. And we had to rearrange our Sunday morning schedule this morning to continue to let her recover.

And it was a challenging weekend because I prayed like I'd never prayed before that Emersen would get better, stop throwing up and just be well. Wes and I prayer over Em, I prayed while she slept and I held her. And she still threw up again. And again. And that's hard to deal with.
I'm sure many are familiar with the Garth Brooks song "Unanswered Prayers" where he thanks God for unanswered prayers - like the one for the high school sweetheart that he didn't get but got his wife instead.
And right now I'm reading a book by Mark Batterson called "In a Pit with a Lion on a Snowy Day" that is about how we avoid risk and pain. That's how we often pray. We pray for our circumstances to change, to end. We pray for the pain to end, for things to get easier. We pray for a break, for a streak of luck. But the author talks about how God uses our circumstances to get us to where He wants us to go. Often, our experiences give us the preparation for ministry later on, becuase you can relate to another person's problems. The title of the book is about a person in the Bible who chased a lion into a pit and slayed it. The point is that most people run from the lion instead of chasing and conquering it.
And in the midst of those circumstances I often find myself trying to pray myself out of, I remember Job. God allowed A LOT of horrible things to happen to Job because he KNEW that Job wouldn't succumb to Satan's temptation but would still worship Him. And I find myself fearing that I will have to go through tests like that. And in my head, I know that that is flattering...that God would be that confident in me. But I don't wanna. My human nature doesn't want to.

Back to the book I'm reading, one of the things Mark Batterson points out is that joy is mind over matter, that one of the things NOBODY can do to you or take from you is your attitude. In a story from a Holocost survivor, that's his "lesson learned" - that they could take his clothes, family, pride and so forth. But they couldn't do anything about his attitude, he controlled that. And he survived the Holocost. And I complain about going to work, or cleaning, or being tired. Come on lady.

So back to my "unanswered prayers" - Emersen did stop throwing anything much up, so I could hold her and she could sleep in spurts and was only gagging. Emersen's bug only lasted through one night. Emersen got some sleep. She could drink and eat that morning. My husband was there to help us out, wash towels in the middle of the night, run to the store for Pedialyte and put a few smiles on her face. It was the weekend so we could catch up on our rest the next day. And praise the Lord, nobody else has gotten sick. And before that Emersen has only just taken her first dose of antibiotics this month - her doctor was so surprised. God is good. Inherently, not dependent on my circumstances. His goodness is unconditional. My joy and attitude should be as well.

Book Review: Sex or not?

Tricked you with the title, eh? As I previously mentioned on the blog, I found a small publishing website that will send you free books from their selection if you will read the book, write a review on your blog, and provide a review on a retail site. Sign me up - I find that I get in book ruts often. I'll read a few of the same type and then get bored. From children's, to devotionals, to fiction, to mystery - there was a lot to choose from. I selected a book that is actual a 2-fer....2 books in one.

Purity's Big Pay Off/Premarital Sex is a Big Rip-off, edited by Donna Lee Schillinger, offered two perspectives on the issue of premarital sex. By two perspectives, I'm referring not to opposing positions, but rather opposing experiences. One side of the book reveals anecdotes of those who waited, and on the flip side (literally, you flip the book over) are those who "tried it out" with someone who wasn't their spouse.

Donna Lee Schillinger is a Christian writer and therefore has gathered together other Christians to share their personal stories.Obviously when "common folks" are writing the stories, as opposed to a professional author, it reads different and the style/tone varies with each experience. However, the issue remains the most important thing, rather than finding a flowery way to communicate ideas.

To evaluate the book, I asked the question "Would this be effective?" with someone that isn't married yet. As in, would this stop someone from having premarital sex? But, in reality, this book also provides some clarity to the person who didn't wait that and how they can pursue purity as well. Additionally, the book addresses purity as a goal, rather than simply not having intercourse before marriage; something I think is overlooked and is definitely a missing link in abstinence encouragement for those who are unmarried.

First and foremost, parents are responsible for teaching their children values and ideals that promote positive behavior, leaving risky sexual behavior as completely counter intuitive to their worldview. Wes and I feel that when you focus on what TO DO, rather than what NOT TO DO or what is OFF LIMITS, you'll be too busy to worry about what rules you might break. In a recent sermon, the pastor echoed this idea in that if you're raising your children to be world-changers, they're going to be too focused and busy to waste time drinking or driving drunk.

I say all that to say that this book might help supplement that teaching. It might give you the opportunity as a parent to share anecdotal evidence to support the lessons you are teaching without having to get too graphic or share too little or too much about your personal experiences. Kids sometimes think that's gross...Some brief examples from the book:

One writer includes that she was taught by her parents that sex was something that should be between man and wife, as well as being taught the same thing from a Christian perspective. She acknowledged that her abstinence success wouldn't have happened if it was only about not breaking her parents rule, but her personal relationship with Jesus Christ allowed her to reach her goal.

One writer in the book shares that her parents shared their love story, which obviously lead to her birth, on her birthday each year. She had that level of love, purity and commitment as her example to aim for in life and love.

On one side of the book is a husband who took the rip-off route, while the wife waited until their wedding night for her first time. Once dating, however, they committed to and maintained complete purity until they were married. Several of the writers, in fact, saved their first kiss for their wedding. Once they saw the extreme consequences that can result from sacrificing purity, they went to extremes to protect it with the person they wanted to marry.

Would I recommend this book? I wouldn't have said I was a naive person prior to reading this book, but some of the personal experiences shared by those who engaged in premarital sex were surprising to me. Multiple children out of wedlock, from different mothers/fathers, as well as multiple abortions for a young woman all shocked me a little. I mean, obviously pregnancy is always a potential result, but the personal heartbreak shared of the man that took part in getting a girl pregnant as well as repeatedly taking her to the abortion clinic revealed the other victims involved when two people go against God's best and take things into their own hands. This I think, makes this book worth reading for anyone.

As I mentioned previously, I am providing a book review for this book in exchange for free books to read via bookcrash.com. But I also enjoy hearing others thoughts on a book before reading it, so hopefully this will open up new type of books for reading to those who read the blog! Happy reading fellow nerds.

Little Friends

Two little friends at Cracker Barrel together. Not by themselves of course. We had a rare last minute dinner with our friends last Friday night. If you have little kids, you can appreciate the amazing-ness of being able to coordinate TWO families with a little one for a spur of the moment dinner out. 

The server at our table thought the girls were related, at least cousins. Their hair color IS so similar now. They had a lot of fun sitting next to each other at the table, sharing cups and crayons. After a missed play date due to Em being sick, we were glad we could get them together!

It is quite an adjustment to go from being young and single, especially in college, where you get to hang out with your friends any time you want and for as much time as you want. You often live with your friends, and in my case, went to church with them. We were all together all the time. Fast forward to love, marriage and now babies - it's hard to find time for quality time with your spouse and kid sometimes, much less friends and friends with their own little ones. Now we're not going to the same school or same church. Given our involvement in ministry, and theirs, we often go weeks, maybe even a month, without getting to see them. Obviously, we wouldn't trade love, marriage, babies and families for anything. But I think women especially struggle in their need for a close friend, especially another mom if you're a mom, and it's hard to balance everything with needs vs wants. And there is something to be said for mom/daughter friendships at this stage in life - seeing your little girls become playmates is so sweet. Sweet like "awww" not "Suh-weet" like the guy in the commercials on TV. The end.

I love it, I love it, I love it...

Sunday was the much anticipated launch of our church - Turning Point Church. IT WAS AMAZING! God is amazing. It was an incredible morning, probably the most fun I've had at church in awhile. Given the call Wes and I felt to be on our end of town serving the local church, we really have felt the culmination of the call in our new roles with this church plant. It's been tiring, challenging but mostly exciting to be where God is working.

As the leadership started early, the anticipation built and we were just like "get the people here!" And they came. And with the people, there were so many kids. It was awesome to see their cute little faces at the registration desk. Awesome to see so many trusted us with their precious cargo. Exciting to talk to a couple AFTER the service who want to come back, so were asking questions about childcare and the kids ministry.    

The service as incredible. The auditorium was PACKED OUT - we had to get some extra chairs out. Leaders/volunteers were standing. Bless our mom's group friends who ended up on the VERY FRONT row! Total count for the morning was 285 people. For our FIRST official service. We expected a lot of people, but seeing them and hearing the number - it's real! 

Something that will change after the first Sunday is the length of the service - the excitement bubbled over in Pastor Josh as he shared about their call to Lexington and then got into the message...and his comedy routine...and the best event of the morning was the 11 people who committed their lives to Christ. Amen. 

Loved the morning, loved the people, love the church and love my Lord. 

And love my family.....here's my Valentine's Day Post:

Don't you just want to pinch her cheeks!?!

They have deep discussions at dinner, obviously.

This is Emersen's love...she likes to hug baby close and say "aww" about baby. She also requires baby to hold her drink for her.

Thanks again to my cousins for the hand me downs, as the stroller is a big hit for this walking lady!

We love, love, love this girl so much. It's probably embarrassing for others to hear us talk about her: what she did this morning, her bathroom habits, how she eats, what she says, who made her laugh. But she's such a blessing!

Oh and I almost forgot - Sunday was ALSO the date 2 years ago that I said "Happy Valentine's Day" to Wes and showed him a pregnancy test that was POSITIVE! Can't believe how the time has flown by over the 2 years. God is so good. 

Brought to You by Emersen

Emersen is into promotion. Consider this one of her "favorite things" blog posts, inspired by Oprah, of course. The Kentucky Wildcats are obviously on the list. She can cheer her own version of "Go Cats!" with a fist pump during basketball games. She hasn't learned to distinguish between basketball games so twice now she has cheered for the CATS during Duke games on TV. And that's definitely okay.

Call this a poor man's mirror. Emersen loves checking herself out, while she's doing something, in the reflection of the fireplace. She'll bounce on her scooter toy, sit in a chair or just smile at herself. In this picture, she's just showing a little appreciation to her friend...or the friend she sees in the fireplace.

Finally, and because she really doesn't have a choice, Turning Point Church. More specifically, the water bottles we give out. Good chew toy apparently. She was hanging out while I made dinner and played with the water bottle. I thought I'd maximize on her cuteness and do some free advertising for church.

If you've been around me or Wes in the past few months, I'm sure you're aware we are part of a church (off Leestown Road) launching THIS SUNDAY! With only a few days to go, the excitement is just increasing every day. It's finally here. Emersen, as you can see by the above picture, is SERIOUS about this.

Emersen can vouch for one of the pastors, Josh, as they have a special friendship. She'll reach for him at church. Apparently, she even likes his cologne....

As you may know, toddlers like to point to express themselves, their wants and their needs. Or maybe she just got the wonderfully feminine quality of "talking with your hands" and it's showing itself  early. But I feel certain she's either saying "I am Emersen Cooper and I endorse this message" or "I want YOU to be at Turning Point Church on Sunday morning!" Either way...she has spoken.

Hungry Hippo

Emersen is feeding herself these days. Not every meal, not every food. But she does normally eat her oatmeal in the morning by herself. We've also started sitting her in a regular chair with a plate full of food. She thinks she's big stuff when given her very own plate!

Emersen has finally developed into a "normal" child - she actually ate pizza the other day. We've given it to her just to try before and she didn't like it. This time she ate it. Along with her beloved lima beans. Pizza will be a treat for her, not a staple. That's how it was when I was growing up too. My mom limited me on the number of soft drinks I could have as well. And made me eat breakfast. 

So mean. I'm going to be just like her on this. 

Emersen has impressed me with her obedience lately. We mostly just give her instructions for what we expect, knowing that it takes time with a toddler but it's worked. We started sign language young and it took awhile for her to pick it up. Same with being on a schedule for naps, etc. But we ask Em if she's ready for a nap or bed and she answers us if she is ready. Today she ran to the steps, then to her bed when my mom asked her. Sometimes she'll answer us affirmative if she needs a new diaper or has pooped. This encourages me regarding potty training - it's hard to tell when they're going to be ready.

I'm just constantly reminded of several things, through experiences with friends/family/kids/parents/church/God/volunteering/working:

1. Kids come out "blank" - you have to teach them how to act, what is expected and what is okay/safe for them right now (or what they're not ready to handle). They don't know these things on their own.

2. You do NOT have to teach them how to be mischievous and rebellious (thanks Adam and Eve). God tells us in His word what things we should do (or not do) in our own best interest. And we're to model this for our children. 

3. One of my pastor's says that if the people you lead are confused about expectations or don't know what is going on, it's not THEIR fault, it's the leader's fault. It is a leader's responsibility to fully and clearly explain expectations, rules, boundaries, and processes. And it's mom/dad/guardian/adult's responsibility to lead your children. 

4. Good thing kids are cute, eh? 

Stinker and Stinkier

First, I just wanted you to look at this little stinker.

She starts her somersaults and daddy helps finish them. 

Next, I've got to update you on the topic I talked about yesterday. 

Read here: Washington Post Story 

Here are the things that stuck out to me:

"The statement left some ambiguity, however, because it did not mention a second reason Komen has given for ending Planned Parenthood’s funding: that the group did not provide direct mammogram services but instead referred patients to other providers. Komen founder Nancy Brinker said the organization wants to support groups that directly provide breast health services, such as mammograms. She noted that Planned Parenthood was providing only mammogram referrals."

"In the wake of the Komen decision, Planned Parenthood saw an outpouring of support, raising $650,000 in the 24 hours after the news broke. Komen came under pressure from legislators, including 26 senators (25 Democrats and one independent) who wrote a letter Thursday calling for the decision to be reversed."

A decision that wasn't supposed to be a political issue became one very quickly. It was supposed to be an act of fiduciary prudence. It seemed like a good one from an objective standpoint, regardless of what organization was losing it's funding. Why would an organization invest money in another organization under investigation to see if fund are being misappropriated. But, Komen has embraced "innocent until proven guilty" and will amend their standards. I haven't heard more about the face that PP doesn't provide mammograms, only referrals. However, it's important for PP supporters to point out that ONLY 3% of services are abortions. My boss tells me sarcasm is a spiritual gift - I'm just exercising it there.

Again, I can't get things to mesh in my head about fighting SO hard for the issue of screening in hopes of saving women's lives - such that a huge sum of money was raised in 24 hours and legislators acted so quickly- and putting that of higher priority or importance than dying babies. Or other social issues for that matter! What about those losing their homes, families, jobs, health care and so forth? And in 24 hours $650,000 was raised as a political statement.  

I was talking to my husband about how I can't even play devil's advocate and figure out the other side's rationale in this situation. His answer was "It's sin. That's what it does, make the wrong seem right." I mean, I can "understand" the Komen Foundation's actions - revising policies, etc. But the root of the situation is this - the massive support to an organization who does provide services to the less fortunate but at the cost of approximately 324,000 babies (2008 statistics on Planned Parenhood's site) should shake us to our core. The deeper issue is that in the same year, a total of 1.21 million abortions were performed in the United States, according to the Guttmacher Institute's research. The deeper issue is that you're hard pressed to find an organization that will stand under the pressure of disagreement and not crumble. A bigger issue is that the more you yell and complain, the more you get your way. I have a toddler and I know any parent would say "that's not the right way to parent." But we expect to get our own way when it's our own behavior. 

So much lately, this song has reverberated with me, especially in the face of situations like these. When things simply seem irrational or illogical or come across like the teacher on Charlie Brown and I can't understand the  "wah wah wah wahs." A coworker asked me yesterday if my God was a little God. Or if he was a big big God. My God is ginormously huge and big. My Savior defeated death and rose again. While I can't handle these situations, He can.

Chorus that I love:

All I know is I'm not home yet
This is not where I belong
Take this world and give me Jesus
This is not where I belong

Because of A Baby

Because this blog started because of a baby and because it's my make or break issue, I've got to talk about it. You may have heard that the Susan G Komen Foundation just severed ties (no new grants) with Planned Parenthood. Given the controversial nature of Planned Parenthood's abortion services, people have taken to the airwaves - and all social media- to huff and puff about the news. Fortunately, I have a blog to use to work through my thoughts on the story.


On the Today Show this morning, they shared the story (with bias I might add, only showing an interview with the President of Planned Parenthood and citing the new VP of Komen Foundation as being the cause for this move because she is Republican and had endorsed Sarah Palin), explaining that the Komen Foundation implemented policies not to give financial support to organizations under investigation, which eliminates Planned Parenthood (currently under investigation). At face value, and if you take their policies for what they're worth, this shouldn't be a political issue at all.


On Facebook last night, I came across a link posted from moveon.org clarifying, if you will, that abortions only make up 3% of the services provided to women by Planned Parenthood. Under the title of "what planned parenthood really does," the goal is to educate and inform of true statistics rather than hyped numbers the media and advocates may use. That is good practice for all of us - not to take the news at face value, to check statistics especially when being presented as evidence for or against a candidate or cause. What doesn't change is the argument or stance against Planned Parenthood, because the percentage of abortions provided isn't in question or being argued against. The simple and deciding factor is that abortion, singular or plural, is an available service.


Now I don't know where Susan G Komen stood on abortion, what political party she identified with or if she was a Christian, Catholic or Buddhist. And I don't really expect organizations to evaluate the ethics behind their donations or sponsorships. Not because the shouldn't but because it doesn't seem like this is common practice. I can't expect organizations not professing a relationship with Jesus to act like him or pursue his values. On this issue (abortion), however, I personally do evaluate any organization or candidate by their opinion on abortion. I will vote for the next president based on this issue. It is the deciding factor for me. 


I'm not sure how anyone can argue that you should realize that Planned Parenthood's services are only 3% abortions and then think it's okay to support the organization. Either you do or you don't do abortions. Either you are pregnant or you're not. Either you're dead or alive. Maybe the number of people murdered matters when you're being sentenced for the crime but one is as bad as 10 or 10,000. To God, the creator or life, one life is important. We are fearfully and wonderfully made by him. For he knew us in the womb. 


Susan G Komen Foundation fights to save the lives of women. In this step, it would appear they are taking a step that says they want their money, previously provided to Planned Parenthood, to be redirected to an organization that fully commits to the same goal. This example helps reiterate that the issue is sanctity of life and therefore the stance is pro-life - pro breast cancer prevention, pro seat belts, pro humane society, or other life saving measures - to support those that give to save lives because every life is valuable. After all, God created you on purpose and for a purpose. 


My aim isn't to spark heated debate, judgement or arguments. For the person performing abortion, the person getting an abortion or the person supporting abortion, my God offers the same love, forgiveness and redemption to them as the liar, gossiper, hater, adulteress, or average joe born with a sinful nature (that's all of us, by the way). But I just cannot wrap my head around such heated backlash against the Komen Foundation for deciding, given their history of working to save the lives of women, to not give their money to any organization under investigation (sounds like good business sense) and if it was just because they didn't want to provide funds that support an organization taking lives at the same time, to me that would be justified as well. I can't wrap my head around the idea that a few abortions is worth breast cancer screening for poor women. It IS a tough situation because lives can be, and are, lost. But we're distorting creation when we start issuing different values to different lives. For the same reason there has to be absolute truth about sin, about life, about death and about heaven/hell - it can't just be what each person thinks is right. The murderer thinks its okay to kill, the rapist thinks it's okay to have sex against someone's will, the thief thinks it's okay to steal. God's Word gives us the truth, the values to live by, that do not change. His Word isn't always easy to swallow, but doing the right things isn't often the easy thing to do.


Thanks for letting me share and talk through this. I used to blog my thoughts. And then Emersen came along. These issues were always important to me, but often people would rather just look at a cute baby. And it IS amazing what a baby's smile can do for your day. But having Emersen and knowing Emersen makes me more passionate about this issue. Even yesterday on House reruns, the issue of fetus vs baby came up and with a surprising twist, even the hard nosed House was affected by the reality of life.

Tidbit

Well, Em is sleeping. She had her 15 month appointment today. Based on her reaction to the experience, I don't see her pursuing a health care career! She was a different child. She started her fits as soon as they rolled out the paper on the table. She cried the whole time. Vision test, weighing her, measuring her and so on. I don't think her height measurement is correct as a result. She weighed 25 lbs and was 32 1/2 inches tall. That's only 1/4 inch more than last visit so... her pant size says different...which is 18-24 months and only stretchy pants because her waist isn't that big yet. Otherwise all else was good. We visited Dr Straub at PAA-I'll just say he is not a match to my personality and we won't visit him again. 

That's about all. Glad visits are less eventful health wise these days, thank you God.